to fix for eternity that instant of harmony, to prevent its destruction, and to prove that the search makes some sense, that it is possible at least to find something.
p. 94 the international fiction review 15, no. 2

this book does a lot of discussing about de determination

i am so patient it’s painful i am unreasonable in my devotion

from IT WAS ALIVE, THOUGH DIFFERENTLY by Hannah Gamble

It had a secret name
which in later years came to mean
I will continue to stand here.

It had a food mouth
and a shrieking mouth.

Popular wisdom indicated
that Its hands could heat stones
and a man could cook
meat on those stones.

That being said,
It had a poverty hand
and a riches hand.

They were
the same hand.

the patternists specialized in cerebral asymmetry. With grossly expanded right-brain hemispheres, they were highly intuitive, given to metaphors, parallels, and sudden cognitive leaps. Their inventive minds and quick, unpredictable genius had given them a competitive edge at first. But with these advantages had come grave weaknesses: autism, fugue states, and paranoia. Patternists grew out of control and became grotesque webs of fantasy.” – Bruce Sterling Schismatrix Plus

i think about forgotten gestures, the multiple signals and words of grandparents, lost little by little, not inherited, fallen one after the other off the tree of time.

julio, you sexist pig, i love you still (for thinking about the misplaced keys).  note to self:  find old series of cantos concerning keys (and pan-cakes).

 and all this reminds me, i still need to see this movie.

every fortran is desirable and necessary.  
p. 347 a manual for manuel

i like this guy, especially the first poem.

no cigarettes for over a month!!  (except for all night dancing in brooklyn, but we won’t talk about that.)  i think if i only steal smokes when i’m out it will be okay.  i guess it helps to never go out anymore.  well falalalala..la..la..la..la happy birthday to me.

 momasita bonita in gingham.  bonita petronzio is a fancy name to live up to.

 before they had me

 i remember always looking at the boy with the scarf in that picture when i was little

and i remember that lanky mouse with the sweet serious face and long legs